I just got back from seeing the latest Marvel movie, "The Avengers." Stay after the movie ends because there are two Easter eggs. I liked the movie alot, but I'm pissed off. We (my girl, her son, my brother, and two friends) got to the midnight showing at 23:15 (11:15PM) to make sure we could get seats where we wanted, and all together. At 23:29 the commercials started. They ended at 00:25 (twenty-five minutes after midnight). At $16.00 a ticket, times six tickets, is 96 bucks--to watch 56 minutes of advertising before getting what we paid to see. About four minutes of that was previews for new movies, the new Batman and Spider-Man being the most notable, so let's call it 52 minutes. That's still on the bad side of 'pretty fucked up.' For $96.00, you should shut all that crap up and just show me the movie...and give me all the damn popcorn and sodas I can hold.
Now, at this point, I would like to respond in a reasonable and articulate fashion to our treatment at the hands of the celluloid mafia.
Unfortunately, I am unable to do so...so, fuck Carmike Cinemas, Hollywood, and Marvel Comics in their collective asses. With a jackhammer. That has been mounted onto the front of an inbound cruise missile. That is nuclear-capable. And I'd like to see a little sandpaper wrapped around the end of that jackhammer, too, now that I think about it. And is there any way to work a chainsaw in there? Like right on the end?
Wait, I'm getting off the point here, let's get back to the message:
We pay the outrageous ticket prices for your movies. We even put up with extortionate theater prices for beverages and snacks. Not to mention the indifferent staff and all the gum on the floor and parking hassles and everything else. Why must you fuck with us even more? Are you people thieves, incredibly greedy, or just fucking stupid?
Aha...I think I have found the reason. It's all three. Or, to put it another way:
You're a bunch of total assholes.
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